Here’s the biggest headlines you missed while on break
The following content is purely satirical and entirely fictional.
The following content is purely satirical and entirely fictional.
The following content is purely satirical and entirely fictional.
The following content is purely satirical and entirely fictional.
“We will start with the basics of forming a deficit, explaining the principles of living in Manhattan and ‘buy now, pay later’-ing Doordashed Starbucks,” he said. “Then, we will move onto digging oneself deeper by asking relatives for money and buying Blockbuster stock.”
“We will start with the basics of forming a deficit, explaining the principles of living in Manhattan and ‘buy now, pay later’-ing Doordashed Starbucks,” he said. “Then, we will move onto digging oneself deeper by asking relatives for money and buying Blockbuster stock.”
First-year students decide to haze themselves after getting rejected from some of Princeton’s most prestigious clubs.
First-year students decide to haze themselves after getting rejected from some of Princeton’s most prestigious clubs.
“My job is to keep our pure community safe from the oar tuggers and piss drinkers of the world,” Cottage President Ronald J. Clump ‘26 said. “We’re going to build a beautiful barrier, one of the best you’ve ever seen. A massive monument to our, quite frankly, wonderful members.”
“My job is to keep our pure community safe from the oar tuggers and piss drinkers of the world,” Cottage President Ronald J. Clump ‘26 said. “We’re going to build a beautiful barrier, one of the best you’ve ever seen. A massive monument to our, quite frankly, wonderful members.”
After their long-awaited indictment for Crimes Against Humanity in August, VILE Architects’ lawyers have fought tooth and nail, claiming everything from ignorance to insanity drove their involvement in designing Fine Hall. However, by the closing arguments yesterday, they seemed to be backed against a wall, snared in the reams of evidence brought against them.
After their long-awaited indictment for Crimes Against Humanity in August, VILE Architects’ lawyers have fought tooth and nail, claiming everything from ignorance to insanity drove their involvement in designing Fine Hall. However, by the closing arguments yesterday, they seemed to be backed against a wall, snared in the reams of evidence brought against them.