Humor

LinkedIn junior ‘grateful and humbled’ to announce they will be making ridiculous sums of money next summer

LinkedIn junior ‘grateful and humbled’ to announce they will be making ridiculous sums of money next summer

Emma Moriarty

SATIRE: “Princeton’s maxim emphasizes the importance of serving humanity, and who am I but a human?”

SATIRE: “Princeton’s maxim emphasizes the importance of serving humanity, and who am I but a human?”

HUMOR | 12/01/2021

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Construction in your building to start in one hour

Construction in your building to start in one hour

Ben Kim and Anlon Zhu

SATIRE: Students who remain on campus will return to find five cranes and 30 piles of dirt on their beds.

SATIRE: Students who remain on campus will return to find five cranes and 30 piles of dirt on their beds.

HUMOR | 12/01/2021

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Exterminator

Exterminator

Elizabeth Medina

HUMOR | 11/22/2021

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The Advice Cookie

The Advice Cookie

Fizzah Arshad

HUMOR | 11/22/2021

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Marlboro to fund Healthy Lung Initiative at Center for Health and Wellbeing

Marlboro to fund Healthy Lung Initiative at Center for Health and Wellbeing

Hannah To and Angel Kuo

SATIRE: As part of the gift from Marlboro, RCAs will now be providing packs of cigarettes in their condom and candy bags.

SATIRE: As part of the gift from Marlboro, RCAs will now be providing packs of cigarettes in their condom and candy bags.

HUMOR | 11/22/2021

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Bonfire

Bonfire

Paige Min

HUMOR | 11/21/2021

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Pop Tart Pop Art

Pop Tart Pop Art

Sydney Peng

HUMOR | 11/18/2021

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Student body will return to not giving a crap about sports for the next 364 days

Student body will return to not giving a crap about sports for the next 364 days

Liana Slomka

SATIRE: “It was fun following football for the last few weeks,” said Matt Diplo ’22. “But now I can get back to spending my Saturdays doing something that has a real impact the world — roleplaying Norway in Model UN.”

SATIRE: “It was fun following football for the last few weeks,” said Matt Diplo ’22. “But now I can get back to spending my Saturdays doing something that has a real impact the world — roleplaying Norway in Model UN.”

HUMOR | 11/17/2021

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Dorm Thoughts...

Dorm Thoughts...

Arianna Borromeo

HUMOR | 11/16/2021

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We can’t wait for student newspapers to fix themselves. So we’re starting a new one.

We can’t wait for student newspapers to fix themselves. So we’re starting a new one.

Zachary Shevin

SATIRE: The new publication will allow students to publish whatever word vomit they churn out, whenever they want, with absolutely no editorial oversight. 

SATIRE: The new publication will allow students to publish whatever word vomit they churn out, whenever they want, with absolutely no editorial oversight. 

HUMOR | 11/16/2021

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Trek to Class

Trek to Class

Paige Min

HUMOR | 11/14/2021

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Facilities urges students to stop flushing copies of the ‘Prince’

Facilities urges students to stop flushing copies of the ‘Prince’

Spencer Bauman

SATIRE: “Well, if you don’t flush them, we’re gonna have to at the end of the week, anyway,”  ‘Prince’ Editor-in-Chief Emma Treadway said. 

SATIRE: “Well, if you don’t flush them, we’re gonna have to at the end of the week, anyway,”  ‘Prince’ Editor-in-Chief Emma Treadway said. 

HUMOR | 11/14/2021

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Volleyball

Volleyball

Sydney Peng

HUMOR | 11/11/2021

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Spell-check

Spell-check

Sydney Peng

HUMOR | 11/10/2021

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Princeton announces plans to build Forbes Annex Annex

Princeton announces plans to build Forbes Annex Annex

Spencer Bauman

SATIRE: “It’s just a cube made of brick,” the chief architect told the ‘Prints.’

SATIRE: “It’s just a cube made of brick,” the chief architect told the ‘Prints.’

HUMOR | 11/08/2021

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TigerHub course registration to be replaced by hand-to-hand combat in a bid to humble students

TigerHub course registration to be replaced by hand-to-hand combat in a bid to humble students

Angel Kuo

SATIRE: The only rule is that there are no rules. 

SATIRE: The only rule is that there are no rules. 

HUMOR | 11/08/2021

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Lilly and Andy: Precept Soundtrack

Lilly and Andy: Precept Soundtrack

Gaea Lawton

HUMOR | 11/07/2021

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Leaked memo: Top 7 ways to spend the new $11B endowment returns

Leaked memo: Top 7 ways to spend the new $11B endowment returns

Anlon Zhu

SATIRE: A leaked internal memo shows Princeton’s plans for spending the new cash.

SATIRE: A leaked internal memo shows Princeton’s plans for spending the new cash.

HUMOR | 11/04/2021

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Time Flies

Time Flies

Elizabeth Medina

HUMOR | 11/02/2021

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Princeton announces new legacy-only admissions policy

Princeton announces new legacy-only admissions policy

Liana Slomka and Hannah To

SATIRE: “Princeton announced that any applicant with double-legacy status will receive ‘double admission’ — the option of bringing a plus one to Princeton.”

SATIRE: “Princeton announced that any applicant with double-legacy status will receive ‘double admission’ — the option of bringing a plus one to Princeton.” 

HUMOR | 11/02/2021

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