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Sam McComb

Student with lowest GPA also to speak at graduation

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Student with lowest GPA also to speak at graduation

Sam McComb, Sophia Varughese, and Caroline Rasmussen
| HUMOR | April 26

HUMOR: While the salutatorian address is traditionally given in Latin, the defictorian delivers a speech in pig latin. Lachey first gained proficiency in this language in third grade, and has been practicing his pig latin throughout his time at Princeton, to the chagrin of his professors.

HUMOR: While the salutatorian address is traditionally given in Latin, the defictorian delivers a speech in pig latin. Lachey first gained proficiency in this language in third grade, and has been practicing his pig latin throughout his time at Princeton, to the chagrin of his professors.

French class perishes in fire while trying to speak to 911 in French

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French class perishes in fire while trying to speak to 911 in French

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | April 12

HUMOR: Witnesses heard students screaming out the window for help, followed by shouts of “en français, s'il vous plaît!” Calls to 911 were ineffective as the students mistakenly used the indefinite article to describe the fire. 

HUMOR: Witnesses heard students screaming out the window for help, followed by shouts of “en français, s'il vous plaît!” Calls to 911 were ineffective as the students mistakenly used the indefinite article to describe the fire. 

University now offering mental health counseling for well-endowed students

blossoms 1 Mark Dodici DP.JPG

University now offering mental health counseling for well-endowed students

Sam McComb and Sophia Varughese
| HUMOR | March 28

HUMOR: There is evidence of this being a widespread problem; Princeton students have larger than average penises, according to self-reported data from ‘Prints’ humor writers. “No one should have to hang pipe alone,” stated one of these students, who we will not name despite his vigorous protests.  

HUMOR: There is evidence of this being a widespread problem; Princeton students have larger than average penises, according to self-reported data from ‘Prints’ humor writers. “No one should have to hang pipe alone,” stated one of these students, who we will not name despite his vigorous protests.  

University establishes new flexible holiday plan: Prayer Points

Murray-Dodge in shadow

University establishes new flexible holiday plan: Prayer Points

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | February 23

HUMOR: To compile the list, the Office of Religious Life assembled representatives from various religious groups in Frist Campus Center to bid for their holidays, in a scene reminiscent of the New York Stock Exchange or the annual NFL Draft.

HUMOR: To compile the list, the Office of Religious Life assembled representatives from various religious groups in Frist Campus Center to bid for their holidays, in a scene reminiscent of the New York Stock Exchange or the annual NFL draft.

Board of Trustees votes to divest from dog fighting and other illegal enterprises

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Board of Trustees votes to divest from dog fighting and other illegal enterprises

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | February 16

HUMOR: This announcement shocked the Princeton community, who were unaware that one-fifth of the university’s endowment was heavily invested in criminal enterprises such as art theft, wildlife poaching, and Medicare fraud. 

HUMOR: This announcement shocked the Princeton community, who were unaware that one-fifth of the university’s endowment was heavily invested in criminal enterprises such as art theft, wildlife poaching, and Medicare fraud. 

A review of some of this year’s new Wintersession courses

snow-prospect-garden-justin-cai

A review of some of this year’s new Wintersession courses

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | January 29

HUMOR: Over the course of five days, Princeton played host to the third annual Competitive Meditation Competition, where people from around the world competed in various events, demonstrating incredible feats of spiritual enlightenment.

HUMOR: Over the course of five days, Princeton played host to the third annual Competitive Meditation Competition, where people from around the world competed in various events, demonstrating incredible feats of spiritual enlightenment.

Department of Comparative Literature continues to compare literature

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Department of Comparative Literature continues to compare literature

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | December 21

HUMOR:  Founded in 1920 with a donation from eccentric billionaire John D. Rockefeller Jr., the Department of Comparative Literature’s mission is to “compare works of literature on the basis of size, weight, taste, flammability, and any other observable characteristic you can imagine.”

HUMOR:  Founded in 1920 with a donation from eccentric billionaire John D. Rockefeller Jr., the Department of Comparative Literature’s mission is to “compare works of literature on the basis of size, weight, taste, flammability, and any other observable characteristic you can imagine.”

Inspired by Sen. Kyrsten Sinema’s courage, Princeton student drops class after failing exam

sinema

Inspired by Sen. Kyrsten Sinema’s courage, Princeton student drops class after failing exam

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | December 11

HUMOR: Gilmore described his decision as based on principle, and not having anything to do with him getting a 19 percent on his last exam, which is also Senator Sinema’s favorability rating among likely Democratic primary voters.

HUMOR: Gilmore described his decision as based on principle, and not having anything to do with him getting a 19 percent on his last exam, which is also Senator Sinema’s favorability rating among likely Democratic primary voters.

CDC concerned with rise of a cappella groups on campus

humor a cappella

CDC concerned with rise of a cappella groups on campus

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | December 7

HUMOR: “Our concern is that the virus could mutate,” University Health Services said in an emailed statement. “It starts with an increase in a cappella groups, but then they become glee clubs. Before you know it, your campus is overrun with barbershop quartets.”

HUMOR: “Our concern is that the virus could mutate,” University Health Services said in an emailed statement. “It starts with an increase in a cappella groups, but then they become glee clubs. Before you know it, your campus is overrun with barbershop quartets.”

TigerHub celebrates 150th anniversary

President James McCosh

TigerHub celebrates 150th anniversary

Sam McComb
| HUMOR | December 5

HUMOR: At the time of TigerHub’s founding, students originally had no say in the courses they took at Princeton. Undergraduates followed a set curriculum that included courses like Predictive Eschatology, Marital Discipline, and Math for Masculine Men. These courses were discontinued in 1873, 1920, and 2018, respectively.

HUMOR: At the time of TigerHub’s founding, students originally had no say in the courses they took at Princeton. Undergraduates followed a set curriculum that included courses like Predictive Eschatology, Marital Discipline, and Math for Masculine Men. These courses were discontinued in 1873, 1920, and 2018, respectively.

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