Headliners and Headshakers

1) TRENDING NOW: Meningitis

2) NO LONGER TRENDING: Gastro

3) Add/Drop Period Closes, Lecture Becomes Very Lonely Place

4) Dinky Awning Collapses— University replies: “You’re next, WaWa.”

5) Return of Pumpkin Spice Latte; lactose-intolerants move underground

6) President Eisgruber competes with iOS 7 update for “Installation of the Week”