We create an environment where our bodies and brains are programmed to never stop. There is always something to do. We could always be more efficient. We are fueling the monster, bringing out our worst.
The chance to change how people perceive you is seductive. It comes around so rarely that mere mortals can only dream of it. But while in some cases it can absolutely be beneficial to start afresh — read: peeing your pants in seventh grade — it can, in others, be best to let who you are alone.
My first memories of Princeton are the awe and pride I felt when I first gazed up at the Hogwarts-style turrets flanking Blair Arch; the muggy, swamp-like air of the final days of summer that made walking feel like wading through a swamp; the utter fear and excitement of entering the Rocky dining hall with a plate of D-hall food for the first time, alone.
In this edition of the Ask the Sexpert Column, we’ll be the ones asking the questions. On Dec. 1, we had the privilege of interviewing Jaspreet Kalsi ’20 , board member and co-founder of the student group Princeton Plays, the only kink and BDSM community on campus.
Appreciating beauty, from a bowl of blended fruit to the Big Dipper on a walk back to my dorm at night, has allowed me to escape from the constant pressures of a success-oriented culture. It has taught me that there is more to life than charging towards achievement after achievement, that I should take time to smell the flowers, or order the açaí bowl.
Dear Sexpert, Like most college students, I spend most of my day on my laptop, working on assignments or watching Netflix in bed. I recently read on a men’s health website that using your laptop on your lap can damage sperm production in the future. I’m obviously not planning on having kids now, but if I keep using my laptop on my lap, will there be any long-term damage down there? Sincerely, Testicularly Concerned
Princeton: We need more breaks. The drive to be the best can become very taxing on a student’s mental health, and the last thing any student wants is to crash.
Because whether it’s for something as small as mice in my room, to a professor saying something offensive in class, I don’t want my gratitude to hold me back — especially regarding injustices on campus because, unlike the mice, I can control my choice to confront them.
Just because you are single doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy college or learn about yourself. I’ve realized that being single often means that you can do so more.
Dear Sexpert; Over the past year, I have been watching porn more and more. How much porn is too much porn and how do I know if I have a problem? Browser
Dear Sexpert, I’ve only recently started watching porn online, and I’ve seen countless advertisements about “guaranteed” ways to make my penis bigger. Also, the guys in the videos are usually longer than I am. I never really questioned my size before watching porn, and I’m starting to feel as if I won’t be able to please my partner if I don’t do something about my penis size. So I’m wondering: does size really matter?
So I set the following challenge for myself: attend any religious event that I get personally invited to, provided that I have time — with the caveat that if it’s a recurring event, then I am only obligated to go to the first meeting.
Does it sometimes bother me that I’m not “cool”? Of course it does. There are days when I would give anything to be the type of person who fits in at Ivy Club or would rush Kappa Alpha Theta. But thinking with my grown-up brain, I’m pretty happy with myself.
We sit around, mumble, groan, and complain about all the things we need to do — all the things that must get done — instead of actually doing it. I am not trying to attack anyone, but all I am saying is that in the time it takes to go on Snapchat and rant behind a black screen, those readings could have been completed.
Sometimes just getting your laundry done is an accomplishment to be proud of.
Dear Sexpert, My friend told me that she went to McCosh Health Center this morning to get Plan B after having unprotected sex with her boyfriend. I am curious to find out more about how Plan B works. Is it the same as an abortion? — Plan A Preferred
Coming back to Princeton after break is always difficult. But these illustrations by Wendy Ho ’21 made us fall back in love with campus.
Don’t lie in bed, idly swiping through the faces you see every day. Just say hello. What’s the worst that could happen?
