? for President

It's hard to be passionate about politics when my feelings about the leading politicians and partisans are overwhelmingly negative. Pessimism does not often lead to engagement, and in my case it has driven me away from the party I most identify with my whole life. Though it may surprise some familiar with my stance on the Iraq war and issues of war more generally, I am and have always been a Democrat. I should say that I was a Democrat, for I no longer feel comfortable with that appellation.

When I came to Princeton more than a year ago, I never would have imagined this sort of reversal of opinion. In my high school's mock presidential debate, I had been John Kerry, and I truly believed the lines I recited and improvised, and when that election did not go as planned, I found myself staring at a TV screen in shock. When I applied to be a columnist for The Daily Princetonian, my hope was to be a relentless critic of the Bush administration. I was fresh off a summer interning for Sen. Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.) — liberal lion, my father's political hero and a man whose righteous anger and heartfelt disgust with the state of things I expected to channel in print.

My first column was a sharp critique of the administration's response to Hurricane Katrina, and for a time things continued as expected. But college has a way of leading one to realizations both unexpected and unsought, and in my case one such insight was how far my feelings strayed from the Democratic orthodoxy on many issues. The catalyst was the left-leaning blogosphere, the self-styled "netroots," i.e internet grassroots, dismissed by the right as the "nutroots."

Just as bad wordplay was common to both sides, so was unhinged anger. While I'd always understood on some level that my side had its share of crazy people, I'd never really experienced it. I was willing to overlook this, thinking that even if the anonymous comments were sometimes insane, the big players weren't. Then sometime last year — I don't remember exactly when — I ran across an old comment of liberal blog king Markos Moulitsas Zuniga, whose response to the murder and mutilation of four American contractors in Fallujah was to say, "Screw them."

That comment brought all my fears into focus, and I began to drift further and further away from the left. One of my defining characteristics is an ability to step back and rationally analyze my beliefs and actions from time to time if sufficiently shocked. These moments of clarity don't always translate to change, but this time, I found myself questioning not only my reading habit but also the beliefs that led to them.

Even though I began to doubt that I was really a Democrat, especially in the wake of Joe Lieberman's primary defeat, I still knew I wasn't a Republican. If the repellant comments of some left-wing demagogues could push me from the party, then there was no way I could embrace a Republican Party equally enthralled to the worst within. I was between a rock and a hard place, at odds with the Democrats over Iraq and fundamentally opposed to the religious right. Nonetheless, in a twoparty system, I must seemingly choose one or choose none.

To this point, I have chosen none, hence the question mark in the title of this column. I cannot see that lasting. I care far too much about the future of this country to sit on the sidelines when I have experience and skills valuable to a candidate. But who is worthy of my support?

Hillary? Smart, but artificial and often dumb, her recent fake Southern accent being exhibit A.

Obama? All flash, no substance, and in my opinion, very wrong on most policy issues.

Edwards? Far too protectionist.

Richardson? Maybe, but he has a lot of issues to overcome before he'd be a viable candidate.

Giuliani? My shaky memories of his mayoralty paint him as a man who'll make the trains run on time, at a price.

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McCain? He sold out to the far right to try and get the nomination.

Romney? A panderer of the first order.

Fred Thompson? Too conservative.

Everyone else? Not serious contenders.

What does that add up to? A giant "?" for me and America. Barry Caro is a sophomore from White Plains, N.Y. He can be reached at bcaro@princeton.edu.