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Headliners and Headshakers

1. Krugman to leave Princeton for CUNY, Tiger Inn officers wonder if State Night taught him nothing

2. Notoriously fratty Dartmouth students meet with professors; administration to discuss abolishing the Greek system over beer bongs, ice luges

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3. Chance the Rapper cancels performance at Yale, Lawnparties improves somewhat relative to other concerts in the Ivy League

4. NJ Transit suspends direct service to Newark, braces for hostile takeover of shuttle buses by aggressive Reunion-goers assuming U. has provided them party buses

5. U. increases contribution to surrounding municipality, fails to quiet Dinky protestors despite larger payoff

6. Columbia student newspaper drops print, ‘Prince’ drops cash to keep print

 

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