I double-checked the number, dread filling my heart. Thirteennotifications?!, I thought. This can’t be good. And, indeed, it wasn’t — a friend from back home had gone through my Facebook posts from 2010 and 2011, when I was a wee junior high student, and bumped the choicest ones into my timeline. Embarrassed, I saw that about a dozen of my Facebook friends — everyone from Princeton students to my mom — had liked a particularly damning status update about my hatred of romance in fantasy novels. The damage was done: everyone I knew on Facebook that day was reminded of a particularly angsty era of my past.
This phenomenon — to "necro”— is not a new one. Since the beginning of Internet forums, there have always been those who dredge up old, forgotten threads in order to make their voices heard in them, either because they don’t understand the culture of the forums they’re in or because they just want to annoy other users. It’s one of the great constants of the Internet: a forum thread or old post of some sort is archived neatly away, and inevitably somebody will stumble upon it and thrust it back into the spotlight.
However, necroing is particularly noteworthy on Facebook because of how personal it is. It’s somewhat humiliating to have a half dozen of your edgier middle school thoughts unearthed — it’s an era many of us would much rather forget, and having someone remind you of how awkward you were back then isn’t always fun. On the other hand, though, it’s almost gratifying to be necroed on Facebook. It proves to you that people care about cheekily getting under your skin, willing to dredge up things you’d rather leave forgotten. It also proves that people are comfortable enough with you that they’re willing to risk your mortification in order to grow closer to you. Necroing is not something mere acquaintances typically do — if you’re being necroed, chances are it’s by somebody who truly cares about you.
This is exactly why I’d like to advise people to be careful when they bump old posts. The thing about Facebook is that it’s very, very public. If you necro somebody’s posts, you’ll see it and they’ll see it — but so will countless other people. Some of those other people will inevitably be struggling socially, and would love nothing more than somebody to care enough about them that they’d be willing to bump old posts. Facebook habits of their friends notwithstanding, it can feel isolating to see other people’s old thoughts in your timeline with the full knowledge that nobody will do the same to you anytime soon.
It’s hard to articulate why this happens, especially because there hasn’t been any research done or studies undertaken about this sort of thing. As such, I speak only for myself when I say it can have an effect. During a particularly drab time near the end of last winter, I saw a lot of old posts resurrected from the dead —and to me, that meant people having a good time together. Even worse, there was an implied “without me” at the end of that, my FOMO augmenting the social anxiety I already felt. These were friends with whom I had spent some time, and I was hurt that not only was I not having my posts bumped but also that I wasn’t around to see them (I assumed) laughing with each other in person about how silly they were in middle school. It wasn’t just that people were bumping old posts —it was that I had nothing to do with it, and that was painful.
Speaking especially from personal experience, then, it often stings to see other people having a good time over ridiculous status updates from 2011 within earshot if you’re not included. Facebook isn’t really a structured group activity, of course, and it’s possible for those not included in the first place to jump in, but even if one not initially involved joins in there’s still that crippling self-doubt that they’re missing out on something or other. And while Facebook is by no means the worst offender here — it’s just text over the internet, after all — it can still be painful for those who feel most socially awkward and introverted to see other people presenting themselves as having such a good time without them.
So, next time you’re going through your friend’s feed from 2009 or bumping bad profile pictures from a middle school dance, it’s worth thinking about who else will see these things. Obviously, the draw of necroing is how public it is — but publicity is a double-edged sword, especially in terms of mental health and social anxiety. I’m not arguing that necroing is an unnecessarily toxic practice that should be ceased immediately — that would be stupid, especially when there’s such a goldmine of content out there from a few years back. However, for the sake of those who may not be in such a positive place, it’s worth thinking before you bump.
Will Rivitz is a sophomore from Brookline, Mass. He can be reached at wrivitz@princeton.edu.
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