Monday, April 29

Previous Issues

Donate now

Submit a tip

Subscribe

Follow us on Instagram
Try our daily mini crossword
Play our latest news quiz
Download our new app on iOS/Android!
CARTOON

Princeton is the school for you: Here’s why

Box: "Admissions, 2023 . . ."; Panel 1: Admissions Officer in purple sweater says, "We know you've got concerns but don't worry - Princeton is the school for (underlined) you"; Panel 2: "We have a 4:1 student: faculty ratio," Picture of box with text "Box of Faculty," "You won't SEE all that faculty, but they're THERE! Somewhere"; Panel 3: "We care about your mental health! Which is why our new buildings use BRUTALIST ARCHITECTURE." Grey box-like building pictured, with a sign in front reading "Art Museum: Not a cinderblock"; Panel 4: "Sleep is important! So we have flickery purple streetlights everywhere." A blond vampire in a red shirt looks up at a purple beam of light in the sky; Panel 5: "Our color scheme: ORANGE and BLACK!" Drawing of black trees consumed by orange fire sits atop text that reads, "Calm, soothing colors that evoke positive images"; Panel 6: "And we have statues of tigers everywhere! But you can't tell if they have fur. Drawing of green tiger statue, accompanied by a question: "Fur??". Below reads, "Our campus is full of naked green tigers!"; Panel 7: Admissions Officer in purple sweater says, "Lastly, we care about the climate. We'll stop destroying it in 2046! Until then, we still expect praise"; Admissions Officer in purple sweater says, "And we're an Ivy League School, so you're all coming anyway, right? ... Great! Just wanted to be sure."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Most Popular