This summer I was helping a rising senior in high school with her college applications. We talked about all sorts of things, from possible essay topics to where she wanted to apply early. Then, she asked me how my first year had been now that it was over. I replied, “Fine.” While that may also be the answer I give my parents when I want to avoid a discussion, she’s used to hearing me ramble on and on with most topics, so she pressed me a bit more.
All of the ups and downs of freshman year came streaming back in a flash. My Outdoor Action trip over Rosh Hashanah, choosing classes for the first time, Lawnparties, working on my first theater production, midterms, etc. The thing is, it’s impossible to describe your freshman year in just a few words. Living away from home, having a roommate, determining how you are going to spend your days and nights are all significant milestones that college students experience. Some are bound to work out smoothly, while others less so. Similar to any other year, it’s bound to have its ups and downs, and that’s perfectly okay.
Being a freshman has its own unique challenges and opportunities. Most students go into freshman year with extremely high expectations, and understandably so. You evidently have high expectations when almost every adult you know is constantly reminding you that “College is the best four years of your life” and that “You are so very fortunate to be going to Princeton.” The thing is, this hype can ultimately lead to disappointment when some of your actual experiences aren’t perfect. When you have such high expectations, you are more likely to feel discouraged at times. Don’t get me wrong, I fully expect all of you to have many amazing moments this year. You can definitely look forward to that. However, all the hype means that students naturally lose sight of reality at times. Everything cannot and will not be perfect all the time.
The thing about nostalgia is that people tend to focus on the good when looking back. That’s why, when adults reminisce on their college years, they rarely mention the bumps along the way. Heck, I look back on my summer in Peru during high school when I had mononucleosis the entire time — but didn’t know it until the day I returned home — as if it were one of the best experiences of my life!
It’s a good idea to keep in mind that this year, while different and amazing in many ways, is just another year of your life. Once you realize that, it’s easier to be okay with the fact that this year, like any other year, will have a few rough moments. Remembering this will allow you to keep those difficulties in perspective, so that you can enjoy the good times even more. A friend of mine here at Princeton was hit pretty hard when his first semester didn’t live up to his expectations of being perfect; it made it harder for him to appreciate and relish all the moments he had enjoyed. Going in, had he acknowledged that not everything would be ideal, perhaps taking these small hits would have been easier.
Once I explained this all to my high school friend, I went on to tell her all the things that I had really enjoyed this past year and what she can look forward to, wherever she ends up. So yes, my first year was fine, perfectly fine, as will be freshman year for the great Class of 2018.
Marni Morse is a sophomore from Chevy Chase, Md. She can be reached at mlmorse@princeton.edu.
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"We — the undersigned leaders, community members, and allies of cultural affinity groups of Princeton University — condemn in the strongest possible terms the University’s utter disregard for the safety and wellbeing of its students of color."
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