Listomania

Butler:

Need a random article of clothing to wear to a party? Lost your black peacoat or North Face at Cloister? Email Butler Buzz, where those who have yet to unsubscribe themselves will read your email and most likely not respond.

Some may refer to it as a useful means of communication, others will flat-out label it as spam, but, over time, it has become known in the community that anything you need or want can be requested through one simple email to your college listserv. Recent items requested from Butler Buzz include a sombrero, a bike tire pump, a bean bag chair, handcuffs and packing tape.

Not everyone utilizes the listserv for tracking down physical objects, however. Some hapless seniors and juniors hold onto the hope that the listserv will help them find participants for this or that survey for a thesis or a junior paper, using bribery when necessary. And how could we Butlerites forget that one Tuesday in November when two freshmen decided to spam Butler Buzz with inane sarcastic jibes after a girl tried to return a lost pencil through the listserv? When your college’s director of studies feels the need to intervene, you know there is a problem. In the wise words of Dr. Matthew Lazen, “Let’s take a deep breath, and stop the email for the day.”

Is the proliferating spam just an unavoidable consequence of such an easily accessible resource? Truth be told, there are genuinely important bits of information that come through the listserv. Without it, we might not hear about many of the wonderful events going on around campus or opportunities to participate in fun activities. For that purpose in itself, it’s probably worth keeping around.

Another way Butler keeps its residents in communication is through its bulletin, The Butler Banter. “Good evening, Sir, there’s no need to eat alone,” reads the first line of the weekly newsletter. Never heard of it? The Banter can be found in Wu dining hall each week in those double-sided vertical plastic slips located on every table. It’s written by a few members of the college council and is dedicated to giving Butlerites the news with a humorous spin, as well as a weekly schedule. Based on its tagline, one might assume it is targeted towards those who are eating alone and want something to keep their eyes busy. With this in mind, however, they certainly can’t expect a large audience. Maybe if The Banter were to join forces with Butler Buzz and send a weekly email version of the bulletin to the listserv, it would gain more readers. Or maybe not.

My grade: C+.

By Kathryn Scott

Rockefeller:

We inhabitants of Rockefeller College are often accused of lacking community and spirit, if only because we lack the bustling listserv that other colleges share. Some down-campus folk have even asked me how we express ourselves, if not through the incessant inbox-inundating conversations and debates that seem to plague other colleges.

Don’t pity us, though; we may not have a WhitmanWire, but our dining hall is indisputably the most impressive on campus. There, the powers-that-be of Rocky provide us with a wonderfully informative weekly bulletin. Rocky’s free yoga sessions and beer-tasting extravaganzas provide us with a more primitive outlet; critical film analyses and major choice seminars keep us focused. Not to mention, we now also offer discussion tables for sustainable energy, classical music and Scandinavian language. Are Danish, Swedish and Norwegian really so similar that their speakers can communicate over dinner? Such are the provocative questions asked and answered daily in Rocky.

Overall, I give Rocky communications a B+. Our seemingly sophisticated bulletins remind us that there is a recreational side to college, and that there is indeed a community away from Prospect Street. Unfortunately, though, our listless listserv forces us to resort to PrincetonFML to troll and preach the opinions that nobody else cares about.

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By Michael Becker

Mathey:

In order to maintain its vibrant community, Mathey College puts a strong focus on providing outlets for students to connect with each other. When the MatheyMail listserv was launched last September, Mathey College Council chair Kandasi Griffiths ’14 promised a place for Mathey-ites to share “favorite jokes, YouTube videos and Princeton moments.”

At first, the listserv seemed like a harmless place for people to shamelessly plug their own events. Then, one person’s request for help finding a lost article of clothing turned into a Mathey-wide controversy: the Blue Sock. So far, there have been over 30 emails regarding the whereabouts of the missing Blue Sock, including criticism of the spam, heartfelt defenses of the Sock and illustrative graphics.

Overall, MatheyMail has been well received by students. It contributed to the development of the new Mathey Co-op starting this semester.

To find out more about Mathey or to cover up an awkward silence in conversation, students also look to the handy Mathey Messenger placed on each table in the dining hall. The newsletter contains reminders about important campus events: the weekly study break, language tables and Mathey-ite birthdays. The Messenger also includes the details of Mathey Trivia Night and Mathey Game Night, each of which has a small but faithful following.

On some lucky weeks, students receive information via the Mathey Crier, a beloved figure in the community known for wearing a toga and performing a humorous monologue during dinner. Finally, the Mathey Messenger makes sure to include several comic strips and/or cute animals to cheer up even those students who cannot participate in Mathey events.

All in all, Mathey communications get an A- from me.

By Neelay Patil

Whitman:

Whitman College is by every measure incredibly young, but its publications have proven to be the start of what surely will be a venerable college tradition. The college listserv, known as WhitmanWire, is a lively hub of discussion, debate and expressions of desire, and the dining hall newsletter, the Whitmaniac, is informative and entertaining — sometimes even inspired.

Every listserv has its prominent characters. Anecdotal evidence suggests that Kevin Donahue ’12, RCA and Social Co-Chair of the College Council, contributes nearly 10 to 15 percent of all WhitmanWire posts, but that’s just anecdotal evidence. Donahue, upon request, mined through his inbox to find some of the best of the Wire from recent years, and my personal favorite from the emails he forwarded was a request from 2009 for a pair of “girl’s underwear… preferably clean.”

Another email from 2009 provoked a debate about the purpose and very existence of the Wire, and one contributor to the discussion quoted the Wire’s founder — Dr. Cole Crittenden, former Director of Studies — in defense of the Wire: “The Wire finds its own way — correcting and molding itself as it sees fit.”

The Wire, in my opinion, has stayed true to this founding philosophy. It’s an appropriate mix of mundane, interesting, annoying and intense. As Donahue said, “Haters need to learn to sort their email or get off.”

Community Hall has a lot to offer, from the best booths around to Dave the card swiper, who is one of my favorite people on campus. And no one ever eats alone at Whitman — the college newsletter, the Whitmaniac, is always there to keep a diner company. Highlights include the “Whitmaniac of the Week,” which honors a different Whale each week, and lots and lots of puns, all the time. Michael Jiang ’13 and Adam Mastroianni ’14 write the weekly installments and were unfortunately unable to comment for this article. I can imagine they’d say something like “The Whitmaniac is the best, and way way way funnier than other residential college newsletters.” Though the Whitmaniac has its off-weeks, it is pretty much the best. The WhitmanWire and Whitmaniac get an overwhelming A+ from me.

By Lekha Kanchinadam

Wilson:

Wilson’s dining hall bulletin — “What’s Up Wilson?” — is standard residential college fare: birthdays, upcoming events, some nice cartoon tigers and that’s about it. There are no thrills there, but WilsonWire, the college’s listserv, more than makes up for it.

WilsonWire is surely the most active, talked-about listserv since “FreeFood.” It’s every Wilsonite’s one-stop shop for “I lost my jacket” emails, opportunities to engage in everything from community service to extreme sports and, of course, some good old-fashioned spam.

There have been several long, inbox-clogging exchanges over WilsonWire this school year. One infamous spamfest began when a student sent out an open invitation to the rest of the college to do his laundry, promising to pay whoever did it. Not something you hear every day, but not unusually controversial, right? Wrong.

The laundry request received an unprecedented backlash. Although the original emailer was not without his defenders, the vast majority of those who hit “Reply All” had little sympathy for him. Perhaps the most famous email to come out of this exchange was a sarcastic inquiry into how much the original sender would pay someone to do his laundry naked. Everyone in Wilson read these remarks, but most of us are still unclear as to how the situation was finally resolved. It should be noted, however, that there have been no reports of nudity in the laundry room.

Some Wilsonites have made themselves known to the rest of the college through WilsonWire. Andrew Ferg ‘15 and Joe Margolies ‘15 have become the listserv’s most active users. Margolies sometimes uses WilsonWire to get the word out about debate team events, but he is most known for the long, verbose emails he will often send to the whole college in response to another WilsonWire email. These emails, meant to be satirical, are not always welcomed by the entire community, but Margolies says that he has received “overwhelmingly positive and enthusiastic feedback” and that his goal is simply “to inject a little light-heartedness into people’s days.”

Ferg has joined in with Margolies, sending satire and the occasional random picture of an adorable puppy. Though they are not trying to make fun of anyone, Ferg admits that he and Margolies can sometimes come off as harsh. He explains that he is simply taking a utilitarian approach to the listserv, “promoting the laughter of the many at the expense of the few.”

However the student population views these shenanigans, they have yet to incite the ire of the Wilson College Council. The same cannot be said for everyone who uses WilsonWire for comedy.

The Wilson College Office is in charge of the listserv, and it periodically makes its presence known. Twice this academic year — most recently in response to a line-by-line, reply-all rendition of “Like a Boss” — the WCO has sent out its own version of spam, an email reminding us what this whole thing is really about:

“The WilsonWire is for general announcements and questions. It’s great that many people find this list useful, but please be mindful about what is sent out. Inappropriate and/or offensive posts, in particular, are unacceptable.”

Despite its numerous flaws, I’m giving WilsonWire an A for pure entertainment value.

By Stephen Wood

Forbes:

The Forbes INNformer — points for the clever name! — is published weekly by Ankit Buddhiraju ’15, who calls himself the “INNkeeper” or “INNformaster,” and is a reflection of his quirky style. It features riddles, announcements and a profile on the “Forbesian of the Week.” Ankit works hard. He says he spends time doing “a lot of informal research by eating at every other dining hall and reading that college’s [version of the] INNformer.”

If you find yourself casually perusing the INNformer over Sunday brunch one day, however, look out. He also admits that he has “[sat] incognito beside strangers and observed them read the INNformer, taking note of what they laugh at, what they read with concentration and what they skim over.” The newsletter can be occasionally bizarre. The most recent “Forbesian of the Week” article takes the form of a story in which the honoree is in the midst of a felony involving a horse. However, the crazy colors and lettering he uses and the usually relevant information included make the INNformer, for the most part, an entertaining, if occasionally strange, read over a morning bowl of cereal or after running out of small talk at dinner.

The Forbes listserv echoes the newsletter, calling itself the Re-INNformer. This year it has been used reasonably, to advertise events or as an informal lost and found. I tend to get no more than one to two emails per day through it. In fact, the Re-INNformer was an important source of information and sympathy after the recent passing of one of the Forbes card swipers, Carole Sutphin, and after freshman football star Chuck Dibilio’s stroke. However, in the past there has been a tendency for weird requests. These have included people asking for colored plastic bags, corn syrup, a leather punch and bungee cords. Despite these puzzling requests, the fair folk of Forbesia tend to treat their listserv and each other in a helpful and respectful manner and try not to spam too much.

By Lakshmi Davey