Column: Crazy NFL season has new surprise each week

Are there any good teams in the National Football League this season? It’s hard to tell. This past week certainly did not help at all.

As of today, the approximate halfway point of the season, there are no undefeated or one-loss teams left. While there are six teams at 6-2, each of those teams has at least one loss that makes you scratch your head.

In the American Football Conference, East Division, the New England Patriots were blown out by the lowly Cleveland Browns last week, while their division co-leaders, the New York Jets, stumbled to a 23-20 overtime win over the Detroit Lions. Meanwhile, the Jets themselves lost a bizarre 9-0 game to the Green Bay Packers the previous week.

The AFC North is similar, as the 6-2 Pittsburgh Steelers have lost to the Baltimore Ravens, who are also at 6-2. But the Ravens have lost to the Cincinnati Bengals. What is going on here?

In the National Football Conference, two teams are at 6-2: the New York Giants and the Atlanta Falcons. The Giants have lost to the Tennessee Titans, while the Falcons lost to the Philadelphia Eagles. The Eagles are at 5-3, but they have also lost to the Titans.

Pardon the bad Eminem reference, but will the real Super Bowl contenders please stand up?

This is a weird season in the NFL, no doubt about it. There is no clear Super Bowl contender in either conference, and, shockingly, the Oakland Raiders are halfway decent and have a winning record at midseason for the first time since 2002 (maybe Al Davis has secretly died).

All but six teams have a legitimate chance at making the playoffs at the midseason mark, giving credence to the NFL’s buzzword: parity. Meanwhile, the Kansas City Chiefs sit at 5-3 atop the AFC West, while everyone’s preseason favorites, the Dallas Cowboys, are sitting at 1-7, tied for last in the NFC, and just fired their head coach. The Cowboys’ companions in the basement are the woeful Carolina Panthers, whose two quarterbacks this season, Matt Moore and Jimmy Clausen, both have passer ratings under 60.

As a side note, are there any teams more hateable than the Cowboys? While they are probably only No. 3 on my personal hate list, which is, admittedly, biased due to several traumatic childhood incidents — cough, cough, Scott Stevens’ hit on Eric Lindros, cough, cough — I enjoy watching the Cowboys lose more than any other team. Normally, after a 45-7 beatdown, such as the one that the Cowboys received at the hands of the Green Bay Packers last weekend, I would have some sympathy for the loser. But then I remembered that it was the Cowboys who lost, cheering me up. Even more than the New York Yankees, the Cowboys are easy to hate.

Unfortunately, Dallas’ chances of winning a game have greatly improved since they saw the light, fired Wade “Son of Bum” Phillips and hired a Princeton graduate, Jason Garrett ’89, as their head coach.

But I digress. Want to know how weird the NFL has been this year? Even the annual “you can’t make this shit up” NFL story is crazier than usual. In 2006, the “you can’t make this shit up” story involved the Detroit Lions’ defensive line coach Joe Cullen, who was arrested for driving up to a Wendy’s fast food restaurant drive-thru window naked. That’s pretty crazy. This year we have three contestants, and we’re only halfway through the season.

The first is Pat McAfee, punter for the Indianapolis Colts, who decided to take a swim in the local canal in 45-degree weather. Afterward, shirtless and soaking wet, he approached a woman in a car, startling her. She called the police, and he was arrested and spent the night in jail.

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Normally that would take the cake, but this year we have at least two other crazy stories. Second on the list is the Brett Favre sexting scandal, which is really just ridiculous when you think about it. We’ve learned a lot about Favre in the past three years, but did you ever think you’d hear about a first-ballot Hall of Famer texting pictures of his penis to female team employees?

Now we have Channing Chowder’s hilarious outburst last weekend about Le’Ron McClain allegedly spitting on his face during the game between the Ravens and the Miami Dolphins. During his rant, Chowder confused Anne Frank with Helen Keller, saying that he didn’t “know who the fuck Anne Frank [was].” The interview also contained this gem of a quote: “Le’Ron McClain spit in my face ... That’s some real ho shit. So if you talk to him, go tell him.”

Whatever happens during the second half of this wacky NFL season, there’s no doubt that it will be entertaining.