On Tap with ... Dylan Ward and Ash Egan

Sophomore men’s squash players Ash Egan and Dylan Ward met each other as 10-year-olds at the Princeton squash camp and are still up to their old habits. Off the court, Ward is the straight main to Egan’s comic foil as the pair trade jokes, barbs and the occasional insult. On the court, the two Philadelphia natives are part of the reason why the team enters winter break undefeated. If the men’s team is going to avenge its 7-2 loss to Yale in last year’s Collegiate Squash Association Championship semifinals, Egan and Ward will have to do their part in their slots.

The ‘Prince’ caught up with them mid-routine to get a glimpse of their relationship and chat about matches with girls, playing as a pair and who is better.

Q: Before they arrive at college, a lot of people have never heard of squash before. What is squash?

Ash: Squash is a gentleman’s sport played by victorious men, men that kind of lead their own lives. Squash is mainly a sport that’s played in the Northeast and mostly at private schools. It’s played in a box with a glass back wall.

Q: Are you offended when people refer to it as racquetball?

A: If you think it’s like racquetball, you should probably unfriend me on Facebook.

Q: What’s your fondest memory on a squash court?

Dylan: Probably knocking Ash out. It was like semis at nationals. I hit him in the head with a squash racket and knocked him out cold. He was bleeding all over the court, and obviously he lost the match.

A: That never happened. ... I can’t say there is one fondest memory, but I can generalize it by saying playing with amateur players and making my ego go out the roof. I don’t like playing girls because I’m scared to hurt them, but I love just beating up on little 15-year-olds who want to hang out with me and know who I am, and I just crack them down.

Q: What’s your most embarrassing memory on a squash court?

D: I don’t get embarrassed.

A: I go commando sometimes. And I’ve been approached — people have made comments. It’s very obvious.

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Q: Do you guys have any specialty shots in the court? What would you name them?

A: I have the “Ash Smash” — that’s what I call it. That’s when I tear up the nick and carve out the squash ball and place it into the little nick. It’s my love spot — it’s where I make my babies.

Q: How lucky are you guys in the court? Do shots fall your way?

D: I am never lucky — I am always on point. No, I get pretty lucky most of the time. I mean practice is practicing — it makes it a lot easier.

Q: What’s your nightmare scenario for a match? Has it ever come close?

A: Probably getting on a court with some amputee. I’ve been on a court with a guy with a nub, and he was from Venezuela, and I lost — he was horrible.

D: And losing to girls.

Q: Have you ever lost to a girl?

D: No.

Q: What would you do if you lost to a girl?

D: I might quit squash.

Q: What sport would you choose to play otherwise?

D: I would do extreme weightlifting because I’ve been packing on pounds recently, mainly in my biceps. I’ve been biceps.

A: I’d actually be a linebacker because I’m built that way.

Q: How’d the two of you meet?

Together: Princeton squash camp! We were like 10 years old.

Q: What were your first impressions of each other?

D: He was much chubbier. He had a “neard” — a neck beard.

Q: Alright, everyone wants to know. Who is the better player?

A: We’re pretty even right now. I think he has the edge. Last time he beat me 5-4 with the tie breaker, whatever that means.

D: It was a ping-pong match, but we’ll call it squash.

Q: Have you guys ever played doubles? Would you two be a good pair?

A: Yeah, I’m phenomenal at doubles. I get really physical on the doubles court — my aggression comes out.

D: I do more running, and he just sort of stands there and sticks out his butt.

A: You really got to get your butt in other people’s faces. You got to mark your territory. Lions mark their territory. It’s our animal instinct. But I mark it on the doubles court with my butt.

Q: Men’s squash is a small team, but you two are the only sophomores. Do you wish there were more?

D: Not really. There should be a third one [freshman Tyler Osborne]. He’s now a freshman, but we don’t really want him to be a sophomore.

Q: What’s your relationship like with women’s squash? Got any dirt?

A: There is so much sexual tension between me and the girls’ team. I can’t speak for the rest of the guys’ team, but I can speak for myself.

D: We hit around them. We beat up on them. We play doubles with them every once in a while. We’re having our annual Christmas doubles special coming up soon.

Q: What’s your least favorite thing about squash?

A: Is that my name is in it. Everyone’s like, “Did you do that on purpose?” and I’m like, “No, I didn’t.”

D: Oh! I just thought of that. That’s nice!

A: And all the jokes about the vegetable squash.

D: Can people never ever make a reference to the vegetable ever again? We know that you know that squash is a vegetable, but squash is a sport that we play.

Q: Do you ever eat squash?

D: I do, yes. I had squash for Thanksgiving dinner. I prefer the soup.

Q: Does the team have any special rituals?

D: We all chug Tabasco before we get on the court to get us fired up for matches.

Q: Does that work?

D: No. It’s a terrible idea. It worked once — I don’t know why I keep doing it.

A: I like to listen to Evanescence before I play my matches with my Bose headphones. But I’m a bigger fan of Creed and Nickelback — and those are my pump-up songs. And I’m speaking for the team.

D: Yeah. No. Actually, he’s not.