Ask The Sexpert — Feb. 5, 2009

Dear Sexpert,

I'm in an awkward predicament: I made out with two people recently, and I really like the second one. The problem is that they're roommates. I don't know what to do - I'm sure they've realized what happened, but I still would like to pursue a relationship or at least something exclusive. Is this even possible? Help!

-Someone with Really Bad Luck

Dear Someone,

This is an awkward situation, but it's definitely not the end of the world. If you want to pursue something, then you should be up front about what happened, whether or not the two roommates have talked about it. You can pull the second person aside, let him or her know that you didn't realize the rooming situation and apologize for making things awkward. Then explain that you're bringing it up because you want to keep things comfortable. If you want to say that you're interested, you'll know that you have his or her attention; if not, you'll have cleared up some tension, and you'll be much calmer without having to worry about them finding out what happened by accident. You can do this!

-The Sexpert

Dear Sexpert,

My girlfriend's sex drive is a lot lower than mine - like a LOT. I want to have sex at least once a day, and she would rather only have sex once a week or so. I'm not sure what to do, and we're both really frustrated: me from being rejected, and her from me asking so often. I like her a lot and don't want to break up, but I can only masturbate so much. Please help me!

-More Sex, Please?

Dear Please,

First, the problem might stem from her not enjoying sex as much as she could. Make sure that things are good for her, because that could be the source of the conflict. If she is enjoying herself, then the best thing to do is to sit down and talk about the problem, instead of fighting about it in the heat of the moment. Without trying to initiate sex, try to work out a compromise. You don't have to stick to it exactly. If she really doesn't feel like having sex, you'll have to put it off for a while, but if you two are in the mood, don't feel limited by the goal that you set. I know it must be hard to feel frustrated so often, but making a plan will hopefully improve your sex life and communication. You can also try masturbating in different ways: Mix up your routine with porn or sex toys if you feel comfortable doing that.

-The Sexpert

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"Sexpert" is written by a team of peer sexual health educators and fact-checked by University health professionals. You can submit questions to sexpert@dailyprincetonian.com. Don't be shy!