Sex is a gift from God to be enjoyed by a husband and wife within a lifelong, monogamous covenant (not a mere contract between consenting adults) called marriage. Marital sex is good, for it honors God, cultivates physical and emotional intimacy, strengthens the marriage and provides immense physical pleasure, and right, for it expresses obedience to God's commands. To deny this is to deny the Biblical doctrine of sexuality and hence to deny the authority, honesty and provision of God.
There are four primary purposes that Scripture gives us for marital sex: pleasure, intimacy and unification, avoidance of sexual temptation and procreation. First, Proverbs 5:18, 19 says, "[R]ejoice in the wife of your youth ... Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated in her love." Hebrews 13:4 reads, "Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled." The Bible even includes "The Song of Solomon," which describes the immense love and passion of a physical, emotional and spiritual nature between husband and wife. The song serves in part as an "instruction manual" on God's gift of marital sex and the joys that it provides. Second, sex creates a permanent union between husband and wife that no one should separate (Matt 19:4-6; Gen 2:24; Eph 5:28-31). Third, husbands and wives are not to deprive each other of sex lest either be tempted by Satan into adultery (1Cor 7:2-5). Finally, marital sex can provide the blessing of children (Gen 1:27, 28).
Non-marital sex — premarital sex, adultery and even lust [Matt 5:27, 28] — is bad, for it dishonors God, destroys marriages, warps the agents' sexualities (1Th 4:2-8) and hardens their hearts, and wrong, for it violates God's commands. No doubt it provides intense physical pleasure. It may even convince the participants that they share relational intimacy. However, pain will result. It may not be immediate; in fact, they may be so blinded that they never realize what they have lost and are missing out on. Inevitably, however, nonmarital sex cheats them of what sex was designed to provide and leaves an irrecoverable part of them behind every time.
Marital sex should be honored; it is the patient but passionate discovery of each other's bodies and emotions, the self-sacrificing mutual commitment to serve each other's needs and the outward renewal of the covenant to love and cherish each other " 'til death" do they part, not " 'til the emotional well runs dry." The Triune God of Scripture is good, beautiful, majestic, sovereign, tender, trustworthy, holy, pure and personal. He commands us to avoid non-marital sex, and joyful obedience will result in our protection and satisfaction; the intense rejoicing in marital sex in the manner He prescribes will result in the maximum appreciation of and unbounded delight in the benefits of this wonderful gift. Since this article barely scratched the surface of the depth, the beauty, the grandeur, the magnificence, the truth and the warnings of God's Word regarding sex, I would encourage you to now investigate the Scriptures yourself.
Cody May '07 is a philosophy major from Center, Texas and can be reached at cqmay@princeton.edu