The fro-yo experience

This week, I stepped into a dining hall for the first time since last May. Boy, let me tell you, I sure haven't missed the stale meatloaf or the brownies that bounce when you drop them. But I've sure missed one thing ... the delicious ooze that we know as fro-yo.

I have discovered that there is nothing more satisfying than a scrumptious swirl of the magical potion that flows from shiny fro-yo machines. To fully convey "The Fro-yo Experience," it will be instructive to highlight several of its specific aspects.

Aspect 1: Taste and Texture. Fro-yo really is tasty. In fact, an "Old School phrase" applies, "It tastes so good when it hits your lips!"

Each flavor really has a unique ability to stand out from the pack. With a rich and smooth texture, fro-yo eaters can focus on the taste, rather than worrying about biting and chewing and tooth freezes that hard ice cream eaters suffer through. Poor bastards.

Aspect 2: Variety. Each flavor has its own following of fro-yo fans, except for Banana. Banana fro-yo? That's almost as revolting as tandoori chicken with pink sauce ... oh wait ... PUDS actually makes that. The ability of the fro-yo machine to hold two flavors, which can be blended together to form a swirl, is rather impressive. PUDS is also pretty good about switching the flavors regularly, so it's nearly impossible to go through a long stretch without a flavor you like.

Aspect 3: Technique. Some prefer the layering method, which involves keeping a steady cone and allowing the fro-yo to fall upon itself, creating a fro-yo mountain. This technique is reliable, as you're rarely going to have the dreaded fro-yo flop (gasp!), during which your yogurt pulls a Leaning Tower of Pisa and then proceeds to acquaint itself with the floor ... or your pants. The more preferred method, the swirling method, in which the cone is rotated, is more risky but has grander potential. After a particularly good fro-yo swirl, students have been known to celebrate by kissing the Buddha-like forehead of Gordon Wu.

Aspect 4: Nutrition. Nonfat. Low calorie. Each serving of fro-yo has a measly 24 calories. On a campus full of fitness freaks, fro-yo provides the perfect opportunity for those health conscious individuals to indulge in a guilty pleasure ... without feeling guilty. Some, however, disagree. "It's kind of deceptive," Molly Fay '06 explained. "It's like the elliptical. People think they can burn a ton of calories when they're only exerting half the energy as they do when they run. Now you can just eat loads of fro-yo, because it's 'yogurt.' "

Interesting point, Miss Fay.

Aspect 5: Creativity. Fro-yo gives us a chance to be creative. For example, Reese's better watch out because there's definitely no wrong way to eat a fro-yo. I, for one, have devised a system. We all know that the best part of a fro-yo is the yogurt/cone combination, followed by the yogurt above the cone. The least desirable part is the bottom of the cone, which is devoid of fro-yo (picture a cake cone if you're confused). Therefore, after finishing the yogurt above the cone, I immediately flip the cone and quickly eat it from the bottom, ensuring that I save the yogurt/cone combination for last. Pete Ryan '07 displays another example of fro-yo creativity. Pete makes his own fro-yo parfaits by alternating layers of blueberry fro-yo and granola cereal. Impressive.

The best thing about fro-yo is that it really is coveted by all students. In fact, juniors and seniors like myself have been known to harbor a great deal of jealousy toward underclassmen and their daily access to fro-yo. So, if you eat in a dining hall, go eat a fro-yo for me and other deprived upperclassmen. Or maybe we can just meal exchange? Neel Gehani is an ORFE major from Summit, New Jersey. He can be reached at ngehani@princeton.edu.