Being known for enjoying life

You probably never knew.

There's no way you could really tell from looking at me. I look like any other college student who stays up too late and runs late to class every morning.

The difference is that if I had been born 20 years earlier I probably never would have been able to go to Princeton — or any other university for that matter. I might not even be alive.

You see, I have cystic fibrosis. You might know of CF through Frank Deford '61's book "Alex, the Life of a Child." When I was born, most people with CF only lived until they were about 18, and CF was the number one genetic killer of children. Those who have read the book or seen the movie based on it and see the numbers of people who suffer from this disease immediately view me in a different light. The difference is that a number of new medications and research findings have changed the face of CF into something far more manageable. However, it's still something that must be handled with care.

My entire life I have dealt with the medicines, the periodic sicknesses, the trips to Yale to see my doctor and the shortness of breath after gym class. I have also had to talk to people about it.

I don't want to walk up to someone at a party and say, "Hi, my name is Clark and I have a genetic disorder that causes my lungs to be infected and my pancreas to supply an inefficient amount of enzymes." There are so many things about me that are more interesting than the fact I take some pills and inhale medications from a nebulizer every day. But then when do you tell people? When they see me grab a bottle of pills at dinner, when I'm in the bathroom cleaning out the supplies for my nebulizer?

Privacy is not what I'm worried about. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. I just don't want to bring up my situation seeming that I want pity and respect from people or to try to make people feel bad for me.

The last thing I want is pity. Everyone has his own hardships, differences and abilities and these should be accepted. Earning special privileges is something I never wanted. I just want to be another student, one with different challenges. This was easy in high school, I just took some pills and did my medicines at home in my free time. It's different now being at college.

One thing I have learned about Princeton, however, is it was built so that the strong will survive. I don't get extra time added onto my day to do the 90 minutes of medications I have to do each morning. On the days I don't feel well, I can't just curl up in bed and recover.

We're expected to study hard, work hard and party hard — a sure recipe for getting sick. Whether it's skipping meals to finish an assignment, staying up that extra hour to read 50 more pages or just hanging out with friends playing cards into the wee hours of the morning, it is something that Princeton students are expected to do. But when I fail to show for some of these things people ask why. Do I respond that I worry about my health? Or do I make up an excuse that keeps me from having to explain out of convenience?

When I was younger I was asked to serve on a panel for a conference about CF and I saw people who said that they had dedicated their life to the cause. These people worked on charity events, served on national committees and were dedicated to saving people with CF.

That type of work never seemed to appeal to me. I wanted to be known for the things I did and enjoyed in life, not a disease that I was born with.

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I am many things — a sports writer, a drummer, an eating club officer, a student and a son. Oh yeah, and I have cystic fibrosis.

Don't be afraid to talk to people about who they are. I have CF and it's a part of me. Just don't feel bad for me.

Clark Thiemann '02 is a 'Prince' sports editor from Westport, Conn.

'A Glimpse Within' is a weekly column in which we ask members of the Princeton community to share personal experiences. The 'Prince' welcomes submissions of about 650 words to The Newsroom.