Letter to Princetonian Children
(02/07/17 3:51am)
Dear Princetonian children, I hope this letter finds you well from the sacred and noble University of Pennsylvania. Our president, Ms. Amy Gutmann, left your school back in 2004 to pursue a career at what she decisively determined to be the nation's superior institution, so I hope you will forgive my condescending nature towards you folks — perfectly intelligent tenants of a top-50 university yourselves.