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Top 10 ways to prepare for midterms
Mar 7, 2018
- Read every Wikipedia article ever written and gain Godlike omniscience.
- Practice writing the Honor Code until it seeps into your muscle memory. Then you’ll know you can do at least one thing right.
- Draw a pentagram on your dorm room floor. Gently place a copy of “Rights, Rules, Responsibilities” in the center. Hope Satan will give you what your textbooks can’t.
- Go over your lecture notes until you project back in time to the lecture itself. This time, you’re the professor. What is a silly little midterm when you’ve won a Nobel Prize?
- Pass/D/fail that one class. You know which one.
- Slowly insert your flash cards through your ear canal until they merge with your brain.
- Go outside and scream a little bit. If you scream loud enough, the air molecules will break apart and you’ll cause the apocalypse. Sure, everyone will be dead, but no midterm, right?
- Put on some music for “background noise.” Dance around your room for a while. Trip and break your ankle. Get free brain food from McCosh Health Center.
- Take a study break! You need to refresh.
- Take another study break! And another one! Watch all of “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” on Netflix! Never study again!