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Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
The University completed renovations to Nassau Hall last week, following through on Shirley Tilghman’s conclusions from the Task Force on Hogwartsification of Princeton University. Renovations included adding turrets, secret passageways and a Room of Requirement.
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Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
Professor of Religious Arithmancy Robert George (l.) and History of Magical ‘Logic’ professor Cornel West gossip about the other teachers while watching ‘He’s Just Not That Into You.’ The two were taking a break during a recent panel on Daily Prophet panel coverage.
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Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
Liz Metts ‘13 and Dora Huang ‘13 hold a debate about moving portraits. Both stepped out for coffee. Please check back in an hour.
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Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
This year, the McCosh Health Center saw an increase in the number of Quidditch-related injuries. Helmets are now recommended.
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Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
A student attempts to enter Platform 9 3/4. Soon, the train he takes may no longer end in Hogsmeade.
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Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
The University completed renovations to Nassau Hall last week, following through on Shirley Tilghman’s conclusions from the Task Force on Hogwartsification of Princeton University. Renovations included adding turrets, secret passageways and a Room of Requirement.
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Top Stories
High Inquisitor bans groups
Following the completion of the Task Force on Undergraduate Student Intelligence, University Headmistress and High Inquisitor Shirley Tilghman and the members of the Inquisitorial Squad have issued a number of sweeping reforms to campus social life.
Students protest magic distribution
In a surprising turn of events at the normally apathetic University, a small number of students have taken issue with the high concentration of magic on campus and have staged a protest just inside the front gates.
He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named seizes Hufflepuff
Following the recent break-in at the Ministry of Magic, the forces of the Dark Lord moved into Princeton Township, using their curses to hex, pillage and murder any foolish civilian that stood in their way.
Hogsmeade Council, Hogwarts decide nothing
Following another dead-end discussion between University officials and the Hogsmeade Council, the decision to move the Hogwarts Express station two-Dumbledore-lengths south to make way for the school’s new Center for Tea Leaf Studies and Magical Mental Health has been postponed indefinitely. This is the 17th time in the past four months that such a meeting has completed absolutely nothing. Trust us; we’ve reported on all of them.
SPEW! accuses U. of house elf violations
The University has been found guilty of a number of nonhuman rights violations, according to an investigation by the Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare!.
Representatives from the group, who were interviewed when all four members of the organization stormed into The Daily Prophet office demanding attention, said that they had found a number of emaciated and “clearly abused” house elves caged in the University’s basement.
Davis’ clutch move nets last slice of pizza
Every kid grows up pretending to do what senior guard Doug Davis of the men’s basketball team did last March. With almost no time left on the clock and facing defeat at the hands of a bitter rival, Davis fought to find an open space on the floor and reached out to grab his prize: The last piece of Frist pizza.
Johnson ’97 lured by University of Phoenix
In an announcement that shocked the college basketball world, Fairfield head coach Sydney Johnson ’97 said Thursday that he would leave his current position at the end of the season to coach the men’s basketball team at the University of Phoenix eCampus.
“I love, love, love University of Phoenix basketball,” Johnson said at a press conference yesterday morning.
Photo by Daily Princetonian Staff
Senior guard Doug Davis is mobbed by fans after grabbing the last piece of Frist pizza, the latest of his many clutch accomplishments.
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