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Ten ways to get a Princeton student to fall In love with you

At Princeton, it’s easy to justify being too busy, too stressed, or simply too tired to even consider being romantically engaged on Valentine’s Day. Despite being scholars, artists, and scientists, it seems as though we haven’t yet managed to crack the formula of finding love — but perhaps there are things that will get a Princeton student to fall in love with you. This week, the Street suggests ten ways to get closer to a Princeton student’s heart:

Step 1: Bring them late meal — It’s often been said “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” but we’d like to think that here at Princeton, the power of late meal transcends gender. A good plate of shrimp quesadilla, fries, or a bag of cookies might just be enough to wheedle your way into a Princeton student’s heart (especially if they’re an upperclassman).

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Step 2: Take them to Sunday brunch at Forbes — Aligned with the theme of food (which seems to dictate much of our life at Princeton), Sunday brunch at Forbes entails a certain level of commitment (enough to walk over to Forbes), an opportunity to have an extended conversation (on the long walk over), and a level of fitness (in making it all the way there). The only downside: If you don’t get a good table you could be sandwiched between two people who you didn’t intend to be part of your soul-baring conversation, which is probably not the most romantic of settings.

Step 3: Obtain passes to the Street for them — Having the humility to beg for passes in the quest for a lit night is pretty much the ultimate expression of love, right? Dark lights, dancing, and terrible hand-eye coordination while playing beer pong — what else could anyone ask for on a freezing Friday night?

Step 4: Go on a run together — For some reason, Princetonians can be seen running at all hours of the day. Whether in the wee hours in the morning or close to midnight, there appears to always be someone making the uphill climb from the toe path (and don’t worry, if you’re not the long-distance runner type, Lake Carnegie has some pretty scenic viewpoints where you can stop to catch your breath). Who knows? Perhaps the endorphins released from running will boost a burgeoning relationship.

Step 5: Set up a hammock on the golf course and look at the stars together — Despite how seemingly romantic this sounds, you need to be careful on this step. Firstly, check the weather so you’re not freezing in the cold (unless you are one of those funny people that can stroll around with only a sweatshirt on in sub-freezing weather), and consider bringing blankets along with you. Secondly, don’t tell anyone else you are doing this or your annoying friends may crawl along the grass to attempt to scare you. Thirdly, make sure that your hammock is big (and stable) enough for the both of you. You probably wouldn’t want your date to feel like a sardine while looking at the stars.

Step 6: Serenade them with the help of Old Nassoul during an arch sing — Music is another way to the heart. This is the Princeton equivalent of you holding a boombox at your partner’s window, real classic stuff.

Step 7: Stroll around Prospect Garden and amaze them with your knowledge of Princeton botanical history — If you are an Orange Key Tour Guide, you’re already set. If not, no fear, a quick Google search should do the trick.

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Step 8: Buy them coffee and chocolates during midterms week — When the going gets tough, the tough get chocolate. Now this cinches it all together. During midterms week, everyone is rushed and the to-do list just keeps on getting longer, so you can show that you care about someone by simply by being there. Don’t talk about GPAs, p-sets, or grade deflation. Just be there.

Step 9: Support them in their Princeton career — Since we’re talking about how to show your love at Princeton, why not help your loved one succeed in their classes by compiling a list of the readings they haven’t done yet, introduce them to professors in their field, and make an exams Spotify playlist (because, let’s be real, Adele will be there for us through the good and the bad).

Step 10: Initiate prolonged eye contact with them when you see them — You’ve given them food. Danced on the Street together. Sweat together. Now you’re at the stage when you acknowledge each other amongst the masses. According to psychologist Arthur Aron, staring into each other’s eyes for two to four minutes is an essential part of falling in love. And remember: Science says it, so it must be right.

I hope this will set you up for next Valentine’s Day. If not, then hey, more late meal fries for you.

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