Petraeus hired as Terrace chef*
Though the highest office of the University is closed to David Petraeus GS ’87, another hall is welcoming him with open arms: Terrace F. Club’s dining hall.
According to seven students in Terrace who said they are “tight” with Petraeus, the ex-director of the CIA is interested in serving as the next head chef at the eating club. The students explained that with his hopes of leading Princeton dashed, Petraeus has come to terms with his misfortune and will accept any opening at Princeton he can get. The position opened last month when Terrace announced that it had fired two of its chefs.
In a statement, Petraeus confirmed that he was eager to lead the Terrace kitchen.
“I love freedom — free nations, free spirits and free love. I am a natural fit for Terrace,” Petraeus said.
But the road to the Green Room has been hazy. Terrace graduate board chair Sandy Harrison ’74 said he would consider Petraeus for the position but added that he was worried about his lack of culinary experience. The pair talked on the phone in early January, when Harrison explained that the position would require him to actually prepare food rather than solely chat with young females.
“That seemed to dissuade him from the job,” Harrison said in an interview on Thursday. “But we negotiated an addition on his contract — he would be assigned a nubile biographer to follow him around while on the job — and he quickly agreed.”
Harrison explained that the idea to contact Petraeus came as the result of a full-page color ad placed in the ‘Prince’ by an anonymous member of its managing board. The newspaper, which had also extensively covered Petraeus’ potential Princeton presidency, featured the ad after Petraeus’ scandal came to light. “Is anyone else interested in giving Petraeus a job?” the advertisement read. “Please? We’ll write an article about you.”
Petraeus, a well-known fitness buff, said he was also in talks with Cottage Club to coach its dodgeball team.
“I killed Osama. I can work a Terrace kitchen or a Cottage sports team,” he said. “I’m invincible.”