Daaaa Bears, Da Bears, Da Bears

On Feb. 5, the Chicago Bears will be playing in the Super Bowl. I say this with great confidence, for two reasons.

First, there's that old cliché about defense winning championships. Thanks to Brian Urlacher and friends, the Bears boast the league's best defense this season. Who cares that they just might be better off with my grandmother — a rabid Bears fan, by the way — playing quarterback than they are with Rex Grossman or Kyle Orton running the show.

More importantly, there's a second rule that guarantees success for the Bears this season. This one is slightly less well-known, perhaps because I made it up a few days ago: one of the outgoing 'Prince' sports editors will be karmically rewarded for four year's worth of hard work with a Super Bowl trip for his favorite team.

Sure, the defense cliché has been borne out over decades of competition. But this 'Prince' sports editors thing, well, it's worked three years straight, so it must be true.

Last year, Anuj Basil '05 and his Patriots celebrated another ring. A year earlier, Joe Falencki '04 and his Panthers made it to the big game. And in 2003, Ramesh Nagarajan '03 and his Buccaneers saw an end to decades of futility.

Let's be honest, when Tampa Bay wins a Super Bowl, you know a higher force is at work.

Anyway, point is, it's worked for three years straight, it's going to work a fourth time, and the beneficiary is going to be me.

Now, I know this seems a little greedy of me. How do I know it won't be one of my fellow editors whose team receives the vaunted 'Prince' sports editor boost?

Mr. Daniel Satterfield, perhaps? Sorry, Dan, but Western Kentucky hasn't quite gotten a pro football team yet.

Ms. Stirling Fiss, maybe? Nope, her Jets have been dead since, well, September.

Or Ms. Anna Lineback? Actually, her Carolina Panthers are alive and kicking. To be fair, they have a pretty tough defense, too. And, now that I think about it, their opponent on Sunday is ... the Bears.

Hmm. This could be a problem. Seems I need to make up a third rule.

Ah, yes: In the case of an even defensive matchup between two teams with outgoing 'Prince' sports editors rooting for them, the team with the best Saturday Night Live skit about it will always prevail.

Prediction: Bears 20, Panthers 6.

(In the words of Chris Farley, "DAAAAA Bears, Da Bears, Da Bears, Da Bears ...")

Slightly more rational thoughts on this weekend's three other playoff games:

Washington @ Seattle, 4:30 p.m. Saturday

When the Redskins entered December with a 5-6 record, riding a three-game losing streak, no one in their right mind thought they would be here.

Six consecutive wins later — every one essentially a door-die game — and Washington is the hottest team in the NFL. For Redskins fans who haven't had much to cheer about lately, it has been a great run, the most exciting season since the first time Joe Gibbs was coaching.

That runs ends Saturday, though. Even against the tough Washington defense, Matt Hasselback and Shaun Alexander will put too many points on the board for the Redskins offense, which has ranged from mediocre to downright atrocious, to keep up.

Prediction: Seattle 24, Washington 10

New England @ Denver, 8 p.m. Saturday

This year's Broncos are apparently the best team Mike Shanahan has coached since John Elway retired after leading Denver to back-to-back Super Bowls.

Doesn't matter. As much as New England struggled early in the season, this is a different Patriot team now that its defense is healthy. The Pats won four straight before resting their starters in the final week of the regular season, and they absolutely destroyed a good Jacksonville team last week.

More importantly, in the words of espn.com's Bill Simmons, never bet against Tom Brady and the Patriots in the playoffs. New England heads to Denver 10-0 all-time in the playoffs with Brady as a starter; they'll leave Denver 11-0.

Prediction: New England 27, Denver 24

Pittsburgh @ Indianapolis, 1 p.m. Sunday

I know, I know, this is the year that the Colts are supposed to be different. After finally beating New England during the regular season, Peyton Manning has exorcised his demons and finally seems ready to lead Indianapolis to the Super Bowl.

Not so fast.

The Colts' last meaningful game was Dec. 18, when a loss to San Diego ended their dream of an undefeated season. Every since, they've seemed eminently beatbale, as Manning took the next two weeks off to rest a balky knee and the team was devastated by the suicide of head coach Tony Dungy's son.

And don't forget the temptation to look past the Steelers to an AFC Championship game matchup with the Patriots.

So which Colts team will show up? I'm guessing they'll struggle early on and trail at halftime, but after an inspirational halftime speech by Dungy, Manning will toss a trio of second-half touchdowns to blow it open.

Prediction: Colts 31, Steelers 17